Kobe: Stay the Hell Away From My Football Team

Kobe -- I like you. Considerably more than most people do. You're from my home town, one of the greatest players to ever touch a basketball, and my dad even claims to have played ball with your dad at one point. But hear me loud and clear when I say this: stay away from the Eagles.

You're a fan of the Birds and Mike Vick and all that and I get it, but chances are it was your unnecessary "Be Epic!" gift to our starting quarterback that caused him to throw the ball up to Riley Cooper in the end zone rather than take his time and clock it. Then you decide to wear his jersey in your post-game interview?

Kobe, again, I like you. But when it comes to the Eagles -- Fuck Off.


h/t Cosby Sweaters