Monday, December 6, 2010

Jeff Francoeur Is A Douche, Please Don't Sign Him

As I'm sure you've heard by now, the Phillies have interest in Jeff Francoeur. Rubes Jr. really wants a platoon partner for Domonic Brown, somebody who can not only hit lefties but provides some good outfield defense. It would appear, on the surface, that Francoeur can do both as he hits lefties (.299 career avg.) and has a strong arm in right field.

The problem is, Jeff Francoeur is a total douche. Besides the fact that he just looks like a guy I would hate, he also seems to carry some perpetual upside that never becomes reality. Plus he was a Met, which pretty much makes him toxic. And he was obviously the reason the Rangers lost the World Series. Oh, and in case you need any more reasons to hope the Phillies don't sign this guy, here is a gem of a quote from 2005:
“If on-base percentage is so important, then why don’t they put it up on the scoreboard?”
Ugh. Last time I checked they do, pal.

This Phillies team if full of good, fun, cool players. Let's not ruin that with Frenchy, ok Rubes?

Don't let me down.


  1. Amaro- Ok Jeff, we're thinking of signing you.

    Jeff- Really? Great news, I thought Philly hates me!

    Amaro- We do! Especially your face. There is just something about your face that makes me want to punch it! I mean your hitting and fielding... all that is great! But it's just your face man...

    Jeff- Oh... well I'll take that into consideration and do whatever it is... I think I can do... to fix that.

  2. I feel the exact same way, dude. I really don't want Jeff Franqueer. I'm a big "hate the face" guy myself, and feel that a good indicator of a person's core being can be deciphered by there facial arrangement, and 9 times out of 10, if my brain can not handle the visual sensation of a person's face amicably, then I'm just not gonna like that person. Having said that, he could be the next Jason Werth.