USA! USA! USA!

The Three Lions can lick my three balls. Yeah...you didn't know that about me did you?

HUGE match tomorrow.
USA vs. England.
Evil vs. The Country Formerly Known as Evil.
Cheeseburgers vs. Boiled Beef.
Democracy vs. Democratic Monarchy.
Savvy Black President vs. Stuffy Elderly Queen.
64 oz. MOUNTAIN DEWS vs. LAME-ASS BREAKFAST TEA.

Rex Ryan understands how important this is. The Embassies understand how important this is. Pride is on the line here, folks!

If we can beat these limey pricks at their best sport, we'll own bragging rights for DECADES. And we're not even using our best athletes -- they're too busy playing sports that require all four limbs. We got goddamn RAPPERS out there! If Kobe and Wes Welker were playing shit wouldn't even be close!

In closing, FUCK BP. I'm gonna be drunk by 10am tomorrow.

USA! USA! USA!

Interleague Play...Uh Oh Spaghettios!

The Phillies are awful during interleague play. Terrible. The absolute worst. Last year they were 6-12, winning only one series (vs. the Yankees) and getting swept twice (vs. the Blue Jays and Orioles). Overall over the last two years they are 9-27 against the AL and sit at a .441 winning percentage all-time in interleague play (only the Padres and Pirates are worse).

To be honest, this stretch against the AL couldn't come at a worse time. The team is still mired in a three week long hitting slump and is about to face four teams with winning records. This might get "celebrities without makeup" ugly folks.

Here's the matchups:

Jun 11-13: At Red Sox
Jun 15-17: At Yankees
Jun 18-20: At Twins
June 22-24: At Indians
June 25-27: At Blue Jays (but the games are played at CBP, so not really)

Thats four good offensive teams (minus the Indians) and three good pitching staffs (minus the Sox and Indians again). Thankfully the Blue Jays series is at home due to the G20 Summit, so they do luck out there. However, the Phillies can't score any runs no matter where they play, so all may be for naught anyway.

The goal here has to be .500. Just go 8-7 or 7-8 and hope the Braves do the same. Even if the Braves play well, going .500 should keep them no more than four games out of first. That's plenty close when you consider the Phillies are ALWAYS great in the second half of the season. Just keep it close boys, we'll win it all later.

Go Phils.

Fun With Dave Spadaro

Fox News :: Republicans
Dave Spadaro :: The Eagles Organization's feathery green dick

And while I sincerely do appreciate the fact that he reports on OTA's and other shit I wouldn't otherwise have access to, he's really just the nerdy mouthpiece for an otherwise cool organization.

The images are pulled from a report on philadelphiaeagles.com about how Hank Baskett looks impressive so far this year. I guess losing the Superbowl for your team has some kind of life-altering inspirational affect...or something.

Behold my boredom and immaturity after the jump.

Almost.

The goal came so out of nowhere, from such an impossible angle, that it all seemed surreal. But with that, the season was over.

The Flyers sure made it farther than anyone could have hoped, but neither the team nor the fans will find any solace in that today. The sting is fresh and will be for quite some time. Losing three one-goal games certainly screams that this series could have gone either way and ultimately the Flyers fell simply because the Blackhawks were just a little bit better in those games.

Once the wounds heal, as they always do, this team will be remembered for what it accomplished just as much for what it didn't. It will go down with the 1950 Phillies, 1987 Flyers, 1993 Phillies and 2001 Sixers as fun teams we didn't see coming who almost won it all. This team was able to capture the city, and turned non-hockey fans into Flyers fanatics for two months. Hell, they even got me back into hockey, certainly no easy task.

Eventually we'll turn our heads to next season, wonder if the Flyers will ever get a stud goalie and hope that players like Leino and Giroux can continue to grow. But for now, it's time to sulk. And that's ok. We're Philadelphia. We do sulk really, really well.

Go Flyers.

Adam Schein, Your Mouth Feels Great

<a href="http://msn.foxsports.com/video?vid=c384b41e-b9a4-47eb-a2a2-95188fbb01d4&from=IV2_en-us_foxsports_articles" target="_new" title="Schein: Eagles not rebuilding">Video: Schein: Eagles not rebuilding</a>
As reported in yesterdays Quality Eagles OTA Coverage, Fox Sports writer Adam Schein is very high -- excuse me -- boom on the Eagles' chances in 2010. Check out this video of Adam with Kevin Kolb and Howie Roseman's bologna ponies in his mouth. Adam SCHEIN also seems to eat up a lot of what Howie ROSEMAN had to say. Hmmm....(I kid I kid). But really though, there's no excuse for a national writer to be this much on our side. I know I believe all of this, but I'm a homer who still drinks the Kool-Aid.  Adam's either playing a game of journalistic Devil's Advocate to get more clicks, or incredibly stupid to agree with us overly optimistic Eagle fans.

Fuck it....he's totally right. Even if he does look like Zach Braff with a Home Improvement haircut.

I Never Noticed Either, Jay

I'm kind of surprised I never noticed that.  The Angels are quite a silly organization.  Are Bob Sugar and I the only people who hadn't realized this before? 

For no good reason, I blame it all on Tim Salmon.

Quality Eagles OTA Coverage

Oh...but not from us. Matt Mosley, ESPN's NFC East blogger and frequent Big D slurper, went to Eagles OTA's today and actually had some very detailed and insightful observations about the 2010 team. How he managed to do this in between writing 7 posts concerning the Cowboys' kickers, I'll never know.

Here's a Look at Your Newest Phillie

The Phillies drafted left-handed pitcher Jesse Biddle out of Germantown Friends High School with the 27th overall selection of the MLB Draft.

And with that, yet another teenager becomes a millionaire while I sit here bitter and poor.

Madden 11 Team Ratings, McNabb's Worth Revealed

The team ratings for Madden 11 were released this weekend and the Eagles were one of the biggest losers. The Birds dropped from an overall 86 down to an 80.

An 80 overall? That's so... Denver Broncosian.

Thiiis Can't Be Good for Our Reputation...

You may think this video is interesting because it's a baby drinking a beer at a Phillies game. I'm more focused on Charlton Heston chopping it up with Jim Johnson in the row behind him.

JJ Lives!

courtesy of Deadspin

UPDATE - Major League Baseball are nazis when it comes to free viewing of their video on the internets. I guess they want to keep all the drinking baby movies for themselves. Screengrab instead.