Thursday, December 23, 2010

Dolla Dolla Bills Yall: Week 16 NFL Spread Picks

We’ve made it to Week 16. It’s just a few days before Christmas and your Fantasy Championship Game. If you’re like me, you failed in every league but one. For my sake, I better win. My fantasy basketball team may be the worst squad ever assembled, and baseball is a long ways off.

All in all, these picks have been pretty successful all year. Hopefully you’ve followed along and made some extra Christmas money. If you didn’t… well then you’re a dickhole and I hope you enjoy whoring yourself out for some extra scratch to give your kids a good Christmas. Wrapping handfuls of Skittles and a bar of soap isn’t gonna cut it, my friend.

For those of you who spent all of our winnings on Christmas gifts – let’s try and win some of it back, shall we?

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Eagles Fans in Boston Celebrate The Win

I really just can't get enough of this game. This little video comes from fabbi2007 apparently from an Eagles bar in Boston. The best part (besides the incredible euphoria I'm sure we all had during this moment) is at the :23 mark when someone yells "get down!" after DJax initially drops the ball. Good thing #10 didn't listen.

Cliff Lee.

Philly Sports WikiLeaks: DeSean Jackson

TheWizWit has numerous private emails from many of Philadelphia sports' biggest names. 
We will leak them as we please.


Aye cuh. I KNOW you seend the game last nite. The hole WORLD is ridin my nuts ova the game last nite. N you kno what everybody in the entire world was thinkin wen they saw me MAKE HISTORY last nite?


I dont kno how I can make it more clear for you that i need WAY MORE than 800,000 hommie. Last time we talked to Jeff Lurie he was on that we-gotta-pay-vick stuff. Fcc Ron Mexico got ta do wit me??? Why i gotta pay for dat niccas herpes medicine!!!

Aye Brodie we both kno I'm the best at what i do. But then why am I not getting PAIDDD like the best at what i do!! Vick put us in a position to lose in overtime, I WON THA GAME. I burnt em up like cali kush.  ROLLENNNNNNNN.

Now i gotta put up wit Andy Reid callin me midget n givin me nuggies n shyt aye Ima SUPERSTAR homey wit my game nothin is unpossible. Look at this:

AND did u kno Im the 1st person EVRR to make the pro bowl in 2 DIFFERENT POSITIONS!!! DID YOU KNOW THAT SHTT!!

Checc it, I kno you asked me to be more professional in my presentations, so I made a diagram 4 u:

Yes I want a Fabergé egg! And dont be surprized i can spell Fabergé! Im fancy!



Monday, December 20, 2010

Merry Christmas Blingee Time!!

Merry Christmas Blingee

Blingee DeSean is here with some Christmas cheer and Tom Coughlin is none too pleased! For those of you that don't celebrate Christmas, too bad. There weren't any "Happy Kwanzaa" blingee graphics. Live with it.

Go Birds.

Cliff Lee.

Bob Costas Articulates Philly's Ownership of New York

Bob Costas wins.  For everything that's been said and written in the last 24 hours, nobody's put it all together better than Costas does during this two minute clip. 

During halftime of the Patriots/Packers game, Costas broke in this little soliloquy where he manages to grasp the current state of the Philadelphia/New York rivalry - and he nails it perfectly. It's truly a fun two minutes of audio for any Philly sports fan. (I'm going to give him a pass on the tired "Santa snowball" line.)

As 2010 winds down, just think about this: It's been YEARS since the Eagles lost to the Giants. Cliff Lee spurned the Yankees to play in Philly. The Mets are the Mets, and they'll forever be terrible. And the Flyers are arguably the best team in the NHL.

God, life is good.  And it's only gonna get funner.

[h/t Sports Grid]

New York Daily News Refuses to Recognize the Loss

Yes, a quick look at the Giants game results (see above) from the Daily News has the Giants triumphing over the Eagles yesterday 38-31. Reality be damned, the Giants won!

Oh, New slay me.

Cliff Lee.

The Manningface To End All Manningfaces

There aren't too many words to describe yesterday's win; just an incredible 8 minutes of football. Complete insanity commenced as DeSean took the punt back and ran his way along the goal line. My apartment was complete mayhem immediately following the touchdown.

To have this game capped off with the best Manningface of ALL-TIME, only makes this win that much more special. Just look at him. He looks like someone farted in his cereal and wizzed in his apple juice. Or maybe he's givin' the stank face like someone just pooted in the green room. (HUGE bonus points if you get that last joke). Regardless, it's fantastic.

Welcome to your Monday, Philadelphia. Life is good.

Cliff Lee.

[h/t KSK for the pic]

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Andy Reid: Haters Gonna Hate

He may be the worst game-managing coach of all time. He may never understand when to appropriately throw a challenge flag or to begin using his timeouts. He may even have eaten one of the rookie special teamers back in 2001. But what Andy Reid lacks in physical fitness and common football sense, he makes up in preparation and consistency.

Who took a "rebuilding" season and turned it into second place in the NFC? Andy Reid.

Who took a ex-con, run-first quarterback and turned him into an MVP candidate? Andy Reid.

Who coached a 35-7 second half to beat the rival Giants and nearly secure the NFC East championship? Andy Reid.

They gonna say what they want about Big Red, cause the haters are always gonna hate.

This Is Fun

The best part of the Eagles beating the Giants by far is checking Facebook after the game. It's hilarious, watching Giants fans going from one extreme to the other in a matter of 30 minutes. I don't know what we all did for entertainment before, I guess maybe we just watch the awful postgame shows.

Another fun thing is heading over the New York Post and seeing what they have to say. Always so quick to dump on Philly, it's good when we get to shove it back in their face. Their Web site font page graphic above says it all, the Giants choked this one away big time (although I'd argue the Eagles did plenty to take it as well).

Anyway, enjoy this one tonight folks. It really doesn't get much better than this. Cliff Lee.

Go Birds.


I think it's safe to say this kid is probably crying again right now. I really can't believe how this week has gone, and after this game I'm pretty sure this is all a dream. 28 points in 7 minutes? A punt return touchdown by DJax with no time left? Cliff Lee?

Yea, if only for this moment, we pretty much own New York right now.

Go Eagles.

Dolla Dolla Bills Yall: Week 15 NFL Spread Picks - NAZI EDITION!!!

This was a busy week for the Shark.  Between a long week at a job that actually pays me real dollars, waiting till the last minute to do Christmas shopping, and my well document laziness, you're getting an ultra abridged version of DDBY.  I'll try to do better for you next week and not wait till an hour before kickoff to do this post. No promises.  I'm also a documented liar.

Alright, no time to waste - on to the picks!