Saturday, October 10, 2009

Michael Vick's Inspirational Dogfighting Story

The Onion wins.

The worlds foremost authority in fake news has an article about Michael Vick's attempt to inspire teammates with a horrifically disturbing dogfighting story.  It's hilarious to the point where all other Mike Vick jokes are now banished to the land of wind and ghosts.

Friday, October 9, 2009

I Hate/Respect Jerry Jones

I just saw the replay of Jerry Jones and Mark Cuban on Joe Buck Live from a couple of weeks ago and was reminded of why I had a search for a Jerry Jones autobiography on my Amazon history.

Don't get me wrong, two decades of intense Eagles fanhood has left me with a healthy and unrelenting hatred for anything Dallas Cowboys related. Fuck the Cowboys. But there's another side of me that looks at Jerry Jones -- the Cowgirls' famed elderly douche of an owner -- with the genuine respect a successful American businessman deserves. Think Wes Mantooth and Ron Burgandy in Anchorman. That wrinkly cocksucker knows how to sell. He had the balls, the arrogance, and marketing know-how to turn Dallas from a 3-13 loser to a 3-time World Champion and the most valuable team in American Sports.

Short clip after the jump.  And, um, ahem -- Emmitt Smith was overrated.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Samuel Dalembert Sucks

Another season, another year of muttering "fucking Dalembert..." to myself. Why do we have this guy?