Saturday, January 30, 2010

Sitting Around In Underwear, Playing Video Games Can Now Make You Rich

One of my goals in life is to become rich off the lottery. I try like any other sucker, but always come up just 4 or 5 #'s short in the Mega Millions. Anyway, here's another way to get rich quick.

2K Sports is offering a chance to win $1 Million dollars for pitching a perfect game in MLB 2k10. The stipulations are simple: You have to be the first person to do it. Contest only runs from March 2nd -May 2nd. You have to do it against the AI. And you have to record the whole thing on video and mail it to 2k Sports for analyzation.

The last part is kind a pain in the ass considering you'd have to roll tape until you finally accomplish the feat, but it's for a million bucks, so quit complaining.

It's actually a great marketing ploy to get people to purchase the game at launch. They've probably written code in the game to make the perfect game impossible to do. But that might not stop me from attempting it at least a couple times before I get frustrated and give up.

I have to give my big lotto dreams a chance. Got a lot eggs in that basket.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Confidence is High!

A higher percentage of people in Wyoming think the Eagles have a shot to win a Superbowl with Donny than those in Pennsylvania, New Jersey, and Delaware. Of course, one vote in The Cowboy State is worth like 20%, but still....yikes.

Hopefully 85% of the country is stupid and we win one with the guy. Or they're right and we win one with someone else. I...I just wanna see the Birds win a Superbowl. Sigh.

Courtesy of

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

The Kicker of the Aughts

The accolades just keep on coming for our Philadelphia Eagles (joke). Today, the NFL annouced some of the All-Decade Team (just the members that made this year's Pro Bowl teams) and our own David Akers has made the cut. The rest of the team will be annouced shortly before Sunday's game, apparently during ESPN's NFL Countdown.

The Wiz Wit sends out a hearty congratulation to Mr. Akers, he's easily been the most consistent part of this team for the last decade. I know I'm guilty of taking for granted always having a good kicker and, even though his leg isn't what it once was, he's still as close to an automatic three points as you can get. We all hope he's got enough left in that leg for a few more years.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Michael Vick: Steroid User?

Everybody knows Michael Vick the dog killer. And marijuana user. And herpes sufferer.

Now we may be able to add another credit to Vicks name. The Dallas Morning News has reported that Plano steroids trafficker, David Jacobs, was Michael Vick's supplier of steroids and HGH when Vick was a member of the Atlanta Falcons.

Ed Block would’ve been proud.

Monday, January 25, 2010

Brett Favre is Overrated: a Minifesto

Brett Favre is a warrior. He's a Super Bowl champion, an MVP and a Pro Bowler. He's gritty. He's tough. He's a gunslinger. He wears Wranglers.

Amongst all of the praise and accolades, many times people forget about something Brett has been for years: incredibly overrated.

Ruiz Turns His Swag On, Signs New Deal

Carlos Ruiz was the only arbitration eligible player remaining for the Phillies. Like the Durbin, Blanton, and Victorino before him, Ruiz has cashed in with a contract extension.

The deal has been reported, but not made official by the Phillies yet. CSN Philly is reporting it to be a 3 year deal worth $9 million. has said it is a 3 year deal worth $8.85 million with $5 million option for a fourth year.

Either way, one of the more underrated players on this team is locked up (along with most of the core players on the team) for the next few years. Not enough can be said about the way Ruiz manages the pitching staff, plays defense, and blocks balls in dirt. His hitting has improved over the years, and is a career .303 hitter in the playoffs.

Phillies fans and women across the Delaware Valley can rest assured their Chooch will be sticking around. Have you noticed how many women have come to love Ruiz? It's rather impressive. He could probably steal my girlfriend if he wanted.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Dolla Dolla Bills Yall - Championship Game Spread Picks

The Championship Games have arrived.  Who will represent their respective conferences in Super Bowl 44?  Well it's really anyone's best guess.  Would you be surprised if either the Vikings or Jets upset the favorites today?  Would you be equally un-surprised if the Saints and Colts just blew them the fuck out?

The answer is no.  So should you stay away and not bet today?  Since you'd be disappointed if I said 'yes', let's see what the Shark has dialed up for you today.