Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Kevin Kolb Will Kill You

We've all heard the stories of how Kolb slays wild hogs for fun.  We also know he's a country boy who loves to talk wildlife and would easily win the TV show 'Survivor' (if it hadn't jumped the shark 10 years ago). 

610 WIP's Anthony Gargano has a published account of yet another badass Kevin Kolb exploit.  SPOILER: it involves snakes, boots, and a .38.

Bleeding Green Nation with the blurb:
["The quarterback slipped off one of his boots – this is why real outdoorsmen wear them – attached it to the end of a stick that he picked from the ground and dangled it in front of the hissing western diamondback. The rattlesnake struck the boot. The boot danced and the snake struck again. And again. Nearly 10 times the snake attacked the boot. Until, finally, the snake recoiled and lay lifeless on the ground. What do you know? It worked. That show on the Discovery Channel reported that a rattlesnake will play dead when prey doesn't fall victim to its spectacular bite. So the quarterback reached down and plucked the rattlesnake by its neck and held it out. With his other hand, he retrieved the .38 caliber handgun fastened to his hip and fired a round into the rattler's head. He then used his favorite pocketknife to cut off the rattles" [Bleeding Green Nation via Fanhouse]
How badass is that? He carries weaponry on his hip and has the same real-world guile that Jamie Moyer has been using on his fastball for the last decade or so.  Stories like these make me like Kevin Kolb more and more - even though I'd never be man enough to do anything Gargano described above.  I'd maybe throw rocks at it from a safe distance.  And that's a big maybe.  I dunno... I probably just lied to your face.  It's far more likely I'd just prance off in the opposite direction.

So what do I take away from this? Our quarterback will put a bullet in the head of anything that gets in his way. Rattlesnakes and defensive backs - you have been warned.

1 comment:

  1. "It's far more likely I'd just prance off in the opposite direction."