Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Gucci Bag Full of Cash & Jewelry: Twitter Summer Roundup

Floyd Mayweather tweeted the photo to the left over the holiday weekend. The tweet itself read "Just gambling a bit in Atlantic City". Staring at Floyd's bricks of money got us thinking... what have athletes been up to this summer? And how much better are their lives than ours?

So we hastily searched scoured the Twitter universe to see what guys have been getting into over the last couple months. A few are as normal as you and me. But plenty of others are definitely living the wild and partying lifestyle of a professional athlete. Except for one familiar face, anyway.

Before we get into that - let me just tell you that, for the most part, athletes use Twitter for dumb shit. Most guys seem to only post about their morning workouts and what movie they're watching. Oh, and the food. THE FOOD!  If you're wondering when your favorite football players' feeding times are, follow them on Twitter.

Anyway, first we have LeSean McCoy, who’s doing pretty much what you'd expect a young, budding NFL star to do - go to Vegas, get wild, and (likely) bang strangers.  Cash AND jewels!

While at the club, Visanthe Shiancoe likes to take part in one of my favorite past-times – judging strangers!  (Although I'm willing to bet this wasn't as fascinating as he thought it was when he continued to tweet about it the following day.)

Darnell Dockett probably has the best NFL Twitter. The guy tweets whatever is on his mind and whatever is going on his life. No filter; I like that. Plus he can transcend fortune and relate to any college student/ poor person.

What would the list be without DeSean Jackson? For every 50 terrible Twitter accounts, there’s a guy like DeSean. He ALWAYS has something goin’ on. Did you know that -- according to DeSean's Twitter -- there were 9 events this summer that were “popn”? No? Well that's probably because DeSean Jackson is rich and famous and cooler than you. Seriously, the guy hangs out with Snoop…. often.

And lastly we have Jason Avant. He’s what you’d call the exception to the rule. No parties. No clubs. No fun. Here's a photo taken during the grand opening of his proudest investment. The "With This Ring Wedding Chapel”. Yep, a wedding chapel business on Vine Street. Apparently Avant is all preachy about marriage and really wants young people to get hitched. So if you’re in the market, check out their Tuesday - Thursday Elopement Special - only $185!  I'm not sure, but I'm guessing Jason Avant is at the core of our nation's high divorce rate.

And just look at the poor guy on the right.  He's downright disgusted by the whole thing.  Seconds after this photo was taken, he gave Avant the Gas Face.


  1. actually
    Avant is not at all at the core
    stupid people are and always will be the core of divorce. Avant is a devout Christian and as such invested in this to help people who had/have been cohabiting due to not being able to afford a wedding and the costs associated with it. Get your facts straight...

  2. "stupid people are and always will be the core of divorce"

    no way. everyone knows that sex with the same person for the rest of your life is and always will be the core of divorce.

  3. This would be my tweet right now, if I tweeted:

    "Oh snap! Anonymous is gettin all serius on WizWit, shit is about to pop off!"

  4. Jason Avant is a patron of Antonino's Pizza in Blackwood. He's the man, probably gonna get his jersey and wear it at work, and then when he comes in and orders his 30 piece, there's gonna be knowing head nods and grins, maybe even a thumbs up. Gotta love that mild sauce.

    PS. that other anonymous ain't me.

  5. I love Rich. Haha.

  6. Jesus that mild sauce is good. I'm gonna baptize my first born in that sauce...