Friday, April 8, 2011

Paul Holmgren is a made man.

Flyers GM Paul Holmgren is a serious character. His koopa-face was constructed from the leftover pieces of Mt. Rushmore. The man could kill a fetus with a sharp glance. He's been known to rip season ticket holders dicks off for not complimenting the smell of his farts.

I'm not saying he's ever really murdered anybody, but you don't finger the man's daughter in the back seat of his own car and get away with it.

On Wednesday he held a closed-door meeting with the floundering Flyers, as reported (fabricated?) by known wolf-crier and Flyer's beat writer Tim Panaccio.

Holmgren told them to get their heads out of their ass or they'll be found hanging on a hook in the butcher's freezer. He then face-fucked Danny Briere's pretty little mouth. (citation needed)

Still 1st in the Atlantic Division, the Flyers sit four points behind Washington in the Eastern Conference headed into their Friday matchup at Buffalo.


Ed Snider couldn't be reached for a photoshop because this blog isn't crazy enough to make jokes about Mr. Snider.

Mr. Snider.

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