Wednesday, October 28, 2009

The Day Has Come



Phillies vs. Yankees
Philadelphia vs. New York
Red vs. Blue
Lee vs. Sabathia
Howard vs. A-Rod
White Trash vs. Sleazy Guidos
Steaks vs. Pizzas
New Jersey vs. New Jersey

Remove all of the Jay-Z from your iPod, watch a Will Smith movie, and masturbate to Rocky with Cheez Whiz lube. ITS WORLD SERIES TIME!!!

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Eagles 27, Redskins 17: What Did We Learn?


DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson DeSean Jackson

Rollins Does It Again


Jimmy Rollins made an appearance on Leno last night. Since nobody seems to care about Leno anymore, I'm guessing you didn't hear what was said.

On national TV, Rollins was asked for his World Series prediction. And in typical Jimmy fashion, he didn't let us down.

I H8 NY

Confession: I live and work in New York.  It's a fantastic city; I love the mix of cultures, unbeatable public transportation, and the shear number of things to do.  It's great.

So -- because of my current residence in NYC -- I've been even moreso anticipating the Phillies/Yankees World Series.  I work with a lot of Yankee fans, and for the most part they've been good sports and we've gone back and fourth jokingly about the upcoming Fall Classic.

But then this morning, as I rode to work on a crowded uptown C train, I see Shane Victorino on the cover of the New York Post Photoshopped in a dress.  Then -- when I get to the office -- my Director runs over and informs me that the Post and the New York Daily News have pages upon pages dedicated to shitting on not only our baseball team, but our fans and Philadelphia as a whole.  What?

Trust me, if you needed any more reason to want to win this series, the comments made by these "newspapers" will make you want to fly a plane into Yankee stadium.

Mark Sanchez Criticized For Eating Weiner

Yep, you read that right. He really did it. On the sidelines of an NFL game no less.

Scandalous!

Back and Better Than Last Year...Maybe

The 2009-2010 NBA Season is upon us, and your Philadelphia 76ers are about to take the court. What's that? You don't care? Too bad, we're going to preview this team whether you like it or not.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Eagles / Redskins: Q & A!


Q: Remember last time when you called that blowout of the Raiders?
A: Shhhhhhut up.

Fantasy Basketball Sleepers and Busts

I'm going to let you in on a little fantasy basketball secret. It's ok, get close...ready? Ok, here it is:

Draft the guys that are labeled "Sleepers."
Don't draft the guys labeled "Busts."

Are we clear?

Great.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Called It! vol. I

The score was 24-3.  The Saints we're getting pummeled by the Miami running game.  The Saints' heralded aerial attack was grounded.  It looked like the middle of the end for thewizwit.com's #1 Power Ranked team, when, at 5:53pm EST, the following text messages were sent:
Maurice
Saints still win this game.  U heard it here first
Chris
Haha I'll mark it down

Two hours later, I can proudly proclaim:

I Called It.

Fat Blubbering Mess: Part Deux

Remember this guy?  Of course you do - this tool was a viral sensation last football season.  He managed to bring shame and embarrassment on not only his sorry life, but Giants fans across the nation.  It was glorious.  You know what - before we go any farther, check it out one more time here.  It's that good. 

Okay, so why bring this up again now?  Because he's back!