Per USA TODAY, THE SECOND-MOST POPULAR NEWSPAPER IN THE COUNTRY:
Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Kevin Kolb elicits the image of Simba, the cub from The Lion King, suddenly thrust to the head of the pride after the unexpected departure of longtime leader Donovan McNabb. And with plenty of hungry hyenas lurking in the NFC East — McNabb, now a hyena in Washington Redskins clothing and still among them — Kolb will have little time to adjust to his new role on the league's hotly contested 100-yard plains, and he knows it.I can't believe this shit was written by a real, live PAID journalist. What a terrible, terrible analogy.
Pumba better watch the fuck out.
[USA Today]
So is Andy Reid Rafiki? DJack and Maclin are Timon and Pumba? Who is Scar? And most importantly who is Zazu?
ReplyDeleteI guess Scar would have to be McNabb. Zazu is Marty Mornhinweg. The hyenas would be Howard Eskin, Angelo Cataldi, and Joe Conklin. Nala is Leonard Weaver.
ReplyDeleteIf Kolb f*cks Weaver I'm done with football.
ReplyDeleteim pretty sure Weaver would be f*cking Kolb...then tweeting about it in the most point-blank terms possible.
ReplyDeleteif i were kolb, id want nala to be my center
ReplyDelete"Just ate some Wheat Thins and made love to Kevin. Now taking the dogs for a walk."
ReplyDelete"Slow sex with Kevin while listening to Aaliyah. We play Kansas City tonight."
ReplyDelete